Yesterday I ran a group with older adults in low income housing. It was my first time meeting this group of 14, all of whom were Chinese or Russian except for 2 African American women. Only the latter 2 women, 1 Russian woman, and 1 Chinese couple spoke English. I figured out pretty quickly that I was going to need to lead this group mostly nonverbally.
At the end of the group, a Russian man who spoke no English came over to me and extended his hand. When I placed my hand in his, he bent down and kissed it. As he stood again releasing my hand, he looked into my eyes. I saw tears in his. Several other people came up to me and thanked me, verbally or nonverbally. Those who could speak English asked when I was coming back, hoping it was next week. While I often get lots of positive feedback after a group, it felt as though people were much more touched by this group. Later in the evening I had a chance to reflect on the group, thinking about what made it so poignant. Here are some of my thoughts.
I always begin group by shaking hands and getting each person's name. Some of the names were difficult to say and remember, but I persisted until I got each one. One of the songs we sang is a Tommy Dorsey song called "You". I use this in most of my groups, asking people to sing lalala except to sing "You, wonderful you", as they point to others in the circle. As I did this, I asked them for the Chinese word for you, which I was told was "nee" and the Russian word which was something like "tee". We all pointed to one another and sang you, nee and tee.
Photo of me leading this activity in a workshop at ArtZ and Dementia
Without words, I gave directives to stand in 2 lines facing each other, each of us with a partner in the other line. I had one person initate a movement which we all did as we took 4 steps toward our partner and 4 steps back. If I were to do this again, I would have one of the lines move over 1 person so that we could get to partner with different people.
I imagine that these folks very much appreciated my attempts to learn their names even though it was difficult, and to learn even one word of their language. I also realized that they probably don't have many opportunities to interact with one another without speaking a common language. I brought the common language ~ the language of movement and dance. E. filling out my evaluation, wrote "We hope we have more chance to have such wonderful program." May it be so.
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